Dream 338 – Meeting Jesus the day after my pacemaker surgery

Received Thursday, June 27, 2019


Dear Father,

Thank You for another day here serving You.  Thank You for a husband who loves You and these journal pages I write as a scribe of Your love.  Without him, I am not sure if any of these would be available for the Nest.  Thank You for the gift of our children, children who pray to You.  What a blessing they are.  Thank You for friends all over the world, friends who send love and prayers often.  I feel so very blessed by them.

I am tired today.  I am in an uncomfortable state as my body is adjusting to this new foreign object in my body.  My eldest son joked that I had a ‘Cybernetics Upgrade’.  Well, he is probably right on that one.  It just sounded funny to me.  As I was looking through some papers this morning trying to find a certain document, I noticed my wound was bleeding where they had placed the new unit.

I just took a deep sigh and began to cry.  I was tired.  I wanted to be done.  Just then, I heard a loud boom on our window.  A black iridescent grackle had hit very hard.  It was taking its last few breaths.  I tried to get to it, but it was too late.  A small baby rock chuck came over and started to circle the bird.  The most curious thing then happened when she then tried to nudge the bird awake.  She tried to turn it over.

I had a small towel and picked it up.  I then took it over to some thick brush away from our house.  As I walked back into the house, I looked back and saw the little rock chuck run to the door.  It was acting a bit odd, then it ran off.  I went back upstairs and decided to write down a dream I had from last night…

Sub-dream 1 “The Diorama of David” description begins…

I was in an antique shop with my younger daughter and one of her friends.  We were having fun looking around when I noticed an antique diorama.  This was an unusual site in the natural.  There was no price on it.  I turned to the shop owner.

Me:  “Excuse me, but what are you asking for this diorama?”

Shop owner:  “Oh, that?  That is very old and rare.  It is one of the battles of David.”

I turned and looked at the diorama again.  The arms of the young David had been broken off and his slingshot was lying on the ground.  The place where Goliath was standing only had his ankles and sandals.  It made me laugh.  While there were other scenes that were intriguing in this diorama, this battle stood out to me despite the flaws.

Shop owner:  “So, what do you think?  It’s amazing, right?”

Me:  “Well, I guess you could say that.  However, all the significant people are completely without limbs or heads.  Many are completely gone.  In reality, this diorama is in really bad shape.”

Shop owner:  “Even though it is worth way more, how about $33?”

Me:  Reluctantly.  “Okay, sold.”

Shop owner:  “Hey, I have Noah’s Ark over there.  You should take a look.”

The girls and I went over to a very large display of the Ark.  There was a long line of animals entering the Ark.  However, I laughed yet again as not one animal had its pair.

Me:  Laughing.  “Some kids must have taken one of each pair.”

Shop owner:  “Yes, but you still get the general idea, right?”

Me:  “Well, I guess the world just ended after the flood on this diorama.  With only one of each animal, there would have been no hope to carry on life and populate the world.”

Shop owner:  “Look, it still has potential, right?”

I looked at the girls and we all started to laugh.  After a short while, even the shop owner could not help but join in with our good-natured laughter.

Sub-dream 1 description over…

As soon as I finished writing this dream, I heard the Voice of the Lord where I sat.  As I sat there in my devotional chair, I could hear His Voice as clear as clear could be.

Jesus:  “Erin, Erin…feed My Sheep.”

Me:  Crying.  “With what, Lord?  What do I have?”

Jesus:  “Erin, Erin…My fish are jumping…they are ready to be caught.”

Me:  “With what do I have to fish with?”

Jesus:  “Erin, Erin…My fields are ready for harvest.”

Me:  “Lord, how can I harvest Your fields?  Please show me.  I love You, Lord, with all of my heart.  I am still here.  Show me.  Equip me.  Train me.  Strengthen me.  Heal me.  Please, Lord, for without this from You, what good am I?”

Jesus:  “I give you the world, Erin, now step in to receive this.”

Me:  “Lord, I don’t like this world very much these days.  However, I will find those You send to me.  On my own, I can do nothing.  With You, I can scale a wall.  Without You, I am lost.  Show me what to do.  So many people need You, Lord.”

Jesus:  “I give you the world.  Will you take it?”

Me:  “I am not of this world, but only a foreigner waiting for You, my Lord, to come for me.  I am a citizen of the Kingdom of Heaven, daughter of the King and Bride of my Lord, the Groom.  The world hates me because it first hated You.  The attacks I receive from the enemy are daily and often too numerous to count.  However, none of this is close to what You had to endure, Lord.

“I don’t have anything to give.  I have been in the furnace for 19 years since my vision with Enoch and Elijah.  I have spent these 19 years, or 33.3% of my life, ‘dying to myself’.  This has left me tired and worn.  I have very little means to care for others as I would like to.  I would take in orphans without thinking twice, but I am not able.  The pain of this often overwhelms me.  Lord, I long for the day when You will rise up in us.”

Jesus:  “I am here, Erin.  Ask Me.”

Me:  “Lord, I’ll ask once again…no, wait, please forgive me, I have not asked before…Lord, the sheep, Your sheep, are hungry.  Take me to Your storehouses of food to feed each one that which is good straight from Heaven.  Lord, the fish are plentiful and some are now even trying to jump into the nets on their own.  Please grant me the knowledge and ability to bring these fish, Your fish, into Your nets and boats.

“Lord, Your fields are ready for harvest and Your vineyards are ripe with sweet grapes, late grapes.  Help me, Lord, as I have no abilities aside from You to capture this harvest window and to yield a record crop from Your fields.  However, I am willing.  Still, this seems impossible to me as I am, as my family is and as my friends are.  While we are not capable as we are, we are willing and able through You.  So, Lord, please help us.

“Please help us.  Please help us and heal us.  Please send miracles, bind our brokenness and fill our ready vessels with Living Water.  With You, we can do all things.  Apart from You, we can do nothing.  Lord, please help me with this commission.  Without Your healing, I am like David with no arms or even worse.  With You, all things are possible.  I love You.”

Jesus:  “I love you too.  I Am Who I say I Am.  It will soon be done for you there as it is here in Heaven.”

Dream over…

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