Dream 355 – Jesus and the Wayside Altar
Received Tuesday, September 3, 2019
Thank You for another day! Fall is in the air here. It is cool and rainy. After having the dream about water damage, I discovered that we have some leaking in the window off our dining room. The baseboard was rain soaked. Clearly, the damage is coming from the wall. Sigh…I know we can’t afford to fix this problem right now, so please, Father, heal our window and wall. Please do not allow permanent hidden damage to our home.
This is the home You have prepared for us. It is a blessing to us. Please protect us from harm. Today, I give thanks to You, Father, for all You have done from the beginning. I am so thankful for Your love, Your gifts of dreams and visions and my family and friends. I feel so blessed by all of this. You heap love upon us and I am so grateful. I had a dream last night…
Sub-dream 1 “The Dioramas of Wayside Shrines” begins…
I was shopping and had two dioramas made of porcelain in my cart. The dioramas were of children praying at a wayside shrine of Jesus. A wayside shrine is a place of remembrance or a place where there is an altar. In this case, the altar was to Jesus. These are often situated at a place of beauty and usually along a path or trail.
One of these two dioramas was more catholic in nature and had a depiction of the Virgin Mary. The condition of this piece was perfect. Both of these porcelain dioramas were a hundred or more years old. This one was quite valuable.
The other diorama seemed more special to me and like it had a story. However, unlike the other one, this one was broken, cracked and had repair points on it. While the resale value of the perfect one would be around $500, this one’s resale value would probably only be around $5. Both of them were stamped, signed and numbered.
The broken one had the wayside altar broken and repaired, but Jesus was intact and had a kind face. The little children were missing limbs. One child was missing a leg, another an arm, another an ear, but they all had sweetly painted faces and they were smiling. It is interesting that I liked this broken piece more than the one with little damage that was valuable and pristine.
I still wanted both, so I took them both up to the cash register. After purchasing them, the clerk carefully wrapped them. I then went out to my car and placed them in a safe spot in the trunk. I was just about to close the trunk when a woman approached me. She startled me.
Woman: “I noticed that you purchased the porcelain pieces in the window.”
Woman: “I used to own these pieces.”
Me: “Well, no worries, they are going to a good home.”
Woman: “Do you understand what they represent?”
Me: “I thought I did, but perhaps you can tell me.”
Not certain if she was going to do something strange, I kept a safe distance and clutched my purse. She must have sensed this.
Woman: “Don’t worry, I am not here to harm you.”
Her sincere smile let me know that she was telling the truth and I relaxed.
Woman: “These pieces have been in my family for many years. They represent two different journeys and eventually one path for some. In the instance of my grandmother, her family came through wars. They had very little and they lost everything in Germany. They kept that broken and repaired piece because it mattered to them. The reason they were able to keep this broken piece is that even the thieves did not want it.
“The other diorama came from my grandfather’s side of the family. They were very strict Catholics. His parents died in the war, so there was no one to protest his marriage to my grandmother. This family heirloom was a shrine to their beliefs. They both eventually became close to Jesus.”
Me: “Oh, thank you for telling me all of this. This brings even greater value to these items. Now that I know the stories, I would like to give these back to you. They are yours if you want them.”
I turned to retrieve the first one from the trunk. When I turned back to her with it, she was gone. She had vanished as if she had been a ghost.
Sub-dream 1 over…
Father, I know this dream was a type of parable about two different journeys. Since they both found you, they are both good stories. Sigh…it is just so sad. The thrift stores around here have some extremely old, but damaged, antiques on sale for only fifty cents. If they were not cracked or broken, they would be worth so much more. However, here in the world, broken items have no value. I am like that now…
- I am broken
- I am cracked…and not just hairline fractures
- I am repaired in places…but still no longer able to perform
- I am missing body parts
- I have taken heavy losses
While I was at the bottom of the heap…
- I was passed over
- I was humiliated
- I have been abandoned
- I have been forgotten
- I have trembled
- I have cried…and not just little tears
- I have been robbed, especially while in my low state
- I have then been humiliated even more
- I have been exhausted
- Sigh…I have been abased
‘Self’ has failed me over and over. There is no manual on how to get back what was lost. Restoration is for homes, old stuff and plastic surgery. However, true restoration can only be done by God. You, Father, are my only hope. The Bible is my Manual for abasement. This all reminds me of a conversation I had a long time ago with a non-believing friend I was close with outlining what she thought about us Christians…
Friend: “Born again Christians need their belief in Jesus because they are misfits and losers who no one likes. What happened to you? You used to be fun. Now I don’t enjoy being around you. You do ‘churchy’ things. Jesus has taken away your fun.”
Me: “No, Jesus didn’t take away my fun. He took away my desire to sin while having fun.”
Friend: “Well, I don’t like how you are now. Stop it and come back to me.”
Me: “You stop it. This is me now.”
Friend: “Well, call me when you get out of this phase.”
Dial tone. That was it. No more phone calls. My friend left me because I had changed course. This was in the early nineties and it hurt me. Oh Father, sin has a course. I have lost friends, so many friends, over the years. However, I have not just lost non-Christian friends, but also Christian ones. These Christian friends claimed that I was going through my troubles, my trials and bad health because I was not in God’s favor.
They implied that I must still be in sin or God would have already delivered me from my troubles and illnesses. In fact, when I needed references that I was a good mother to my children, one friend said no. When I asked her why, she said it was because I had made bad choices and that I needed to lose my kids to learn a lesson. Many people felt the same way and spread many wicked lies.
These people believed the lies of the enemy, yet they still had no problem taking things from me and thanking me. It was not fair. I was not a drinker, a drug taker or crazy. Still, my medical bills cost a fortune and eventually led to my bankruptcy. This was yet another thing these Christian ‘friends’ judged me for. Amongst Christians, this is a disqualifier for any future ministry.
I soon became even sicker and, in the end, it just didn’t matter. The nice thing about abasement is that there is usually a door out and a staircase. Thanks to Jesus, we can even have daylight in a basement. Thank You, Father. Thank You for my brokenness. Thank You for my abasement. If You hadn’t done this, well, I am thankful You did.
Jesus: “Erin, come up.”
The leaves on the aspen trees were shades of gold now and looked so beautiful. I then saw Jesus. He was standing with His horse. He was smiling as He held the reins. While His horse was in armor with a type of headdress, Jesus was wearing His crown. I ran to Him and leapt into His arms. He laughed as He hugged me. It suddenly hit me that He was dressed for battle. Even though this defies logic as I know nothing could harm Him, I suddenly became extremely worried for His safety.
Me: Crying, but really weeping. “Oh Lord, are You going into battle?”
Jesus: Smiling with such compassion. “Oh Erin, this is endearing! However, do not worry as nothing will harm Me.” He looked me straight in the eyes as tears streamed down my face. “I am Who I say I am. Be still, I am here. I am not to be harmed as that day is over. The day of My persecution is finished. I am here. I am with you.”
Me: Still crying. “It’s just that, well, it’s just that I love You so much. The thought of You being beaten makes me physically ill. While I am so glad that You did this for us…” I hugged Him tightly. “…please never allow this again. I love You too much!”
Jesus: Laughing. “Thankfully, there is only to be one physical persecution. Even so, I now receive daily verbal assaults instead.”
Me: “Lord, if people knew You, they would love You.”
Jesus: “Oh Erin, your heart is good. However, and unfortunately, even when I send blessing after blessing and do good, there are many who still curse Me. They do not see Me in anything. It is easier for them to curse Me on their lips in passing words than to turn and recognize the source of their success and be thankful.”
Me: “I am sorry, Lord, You are right. Why is Your horse in armor? Why is he in armor while You are not? Where is Your armor?”
Jesus: Smiling. “Oh Erin…always asking questions.”
Me: “Well, yes! After all, it is Your job as the Son of God to follow and be interested in seeing Your Father and to know His comings and goings. This is all part of doing His Will, right?”
Jesus: Laughing. “Yes…”
Me: “So then, Lord, what do I have to lose if I do the same and follow this example You have set. You have already told me that You won’t let my, but really Your, ministry or my love for You be taken away. With this as background to give me confidence, may I ask You a question?”
Jesus: “You may…”
Me: “Soooooo…” Using a dramatic pause for emphasis and then smiling. “…whatcha up to?”
Jesus: We both laughed so hard. “You delight Me, Erin. You are funny. To answer your question of what I am up to…well, I am doing the Father’s business.” He smiled.
Me: “Oh Lord, there is truly no one as wise as You. Though I don’t like it, this truly is the perfect answer.”
Jesus: Smiling. “I know, I know…you would like to know more and, one day very soon, you will. Now, your dream…do you realize that your forestry board and box represented a wayside altar? Well, it did. You came as a child there and you opened the gate into My presence. You then used this to enter into the presence of God.”
Me: “Oh, I never thought of this. I never put any of this together until now.”
Jesus: “Well, I am here to help you. Every time you walked on the path to the forestry board and stepped through the door, you entered into My presence. It is your wayside altar where you remember Me. Erin, I love you and I delight in you. Yes, even My horse enjoys your company. The angels also ask when you will come for a visit…yes, even the serious ones.” He smiled.
“You have taken many losses and some heavy blows on your journey to be here with Me. I know it has been a long time. Many years have come and gone and you still have not realized all that I have planned for those who love Me. You still feel the sting of defeat, the agonies of loss and the abasement of yourself. However, Erin, I am with you in all of this and I promise you that I do not forget what has happened to you.
“While you might forget some of the things, God does not forget. I forget your sin and remember it no more as you have been redeemed. This means you must also forgive yourself and give those who have harmed you to Me so that I can impose justice. You need to do this as you are in no position to hold them accountable and be judge over them, understand? Now, who is better to vindicate you over your enemies…you or Me?”
Me: “You, of course! I am in no position to do anything.”
Jesus: “So, give your enemies to Me. I have them and I promise they will not go unpunished.”
Me: “Lord, I did not come to seek revenge. I was humiliated and crushed and it hurt because these people turned against me. It hurt so much.”
Jesus: “Pray on this, Erin, and, one day soon, you will receive an apology from several. Others will be a bit of a struggle. I have this though, so do not worry, okay?”
Me: “Yes, I already have too much to worry about and I don’t need any more.”
Jesus: “Hmm, I don’t like hearing such things.” As soon as He said this, I felt something very heavy land on my shoulders. “So, Erin, can I remove that heaviness from your shoulders or are you deciding you can live with this?” He smiled.
Me: “No, I hate this. It is too heavy. I cannot function with this weight.”
Jesus: “So, are you saying you are ready for Me to take the weight off your shoulders? Oh yes…and your back too?”
Me: “Could You? I also have some excess weight on my midsection You could remove as well.” We both laughed.
Jesus: “Erin, I will remove it. Just ask and this will be done, okay?”
Me: “Oh Lord, please remove this.”
Jesus: “Done.” In an instant, all of the extra weight was gone. “Now, Erin, I am calling you to come out of your basement.”
Me: “Yes, Lord, thank You!” I hugged Him.
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