Dream 398 – The Kingdom of Heaven is at the Doorpost!
Received on Wednesday, April 8, 2020
Thank You for allowing me another day! Thank You for my family and friends. Thank You for keeping our home safe from looming troubles. Father, I had a troubling dream last night. It was about a funeral for the husband of a friend from long ago. However, when I looked it up, this person is still alive and doing fine.
Sub-dream 1 “A funeral & a hole in one” begins…
I was late for a dear mentor’s funeral. I worked for him during a time of complete crisis in my life. He was a Godly man. We were arriving at the very end of his service. His wife was a good friend of mine. She saw me and ran up to hug me. Understandably, she looked very sad. I looked around at the crowd. It consisted of elderly people that I recognized from church choir over 22 years ago. They all had stoic expressions on their faces. They were emotionless.
I looked over at the casket. It was fully open. For some reason, he looked the same as he did when I knew him from years back. The memorial was near a resort. Since this was in Central Oregon, there are many of these resorts. I did not recognize this particular resort as it has been well over a decade since I have been there. My husband and children were with me, so we decided to check into the resort.
I kept looking for my friend, but soon found out that she was out golfing. I went out to try to talk to her, but she was busy and had no time. Again, she was sad and meeting with many people, so I completely understood. To my amusement, I soon found myself on a hole alone. Someone had left an old 5 wood next to a golf ball, a Titleist Balata. I looked down the hole and decided ‘Hey, why not?’
The hole was a par four of about 220 yards. It was short, but had a dogleg right with plenty of trees. There was no wind at all, so this would be a true shot. Because I had no pressure from other players being around me, I just went for it. My swing was perfect. My body was behind the ball as I watched my clubface hit the ball. It was a perfect shot. The ball headed right where I had prayed it would go.
It landed on the green and rolled toward the cup. I began to jump up and down. I could see my husband in the far distance and called out for him to see this. He was too far away and couldn’t hear me. When I arrived at the green, I noticed a lot of balls around the green. However, I did not see mine. There were some youths there. They took turns talking.
Me: “Hi guys, did you happen to see where my ball went?”
Comment 1: “Oh, it is probably lost like the rest of these”
Comment 2: “Yeah, people just leave them here and lie about it on their score card. We then get to keep them.”
Comment 3: “Here, I think this is yours.”
He handed me a wooden ball that looked a lot like a croquet ball, but smaller. Upon closer inspection, it looked ridiculous. It was a series of blocks shaped into an artichoke. Some of the pieces had numbers and letters. I noticed the numbers 16, 9, 32 and 0, along with the letter Z or N depending on the direction you were looking at it.
Me: “I am 100% sure that this is not my ball.”
Comment 4: “While it would never happen, did you check to see if your ball is in the cup?”
Me: “While that would be hard to believe at the speed the ball was rolling, I will check.”
I walked over to the cup and, there inside, was my ball, the Titleist Balata.
Me: “Okay, guys, did one of you place the ball in the cup as a joke?”
Comment 5: “No way! We are only here for the lost balls, not the found ones.”
Comment 6: In a patronizing tone. “Yeah, take a picture. It will be proof and will last longer.”
I decided to ignore the sarcastic comments and walk away. Even though I was now a distance away, my hearing was enhanced and I could still here them.
Comment 7: “Oh no, she didn’t! Did she really just accuse us of stealing?”
Comment 8: “Nah, I don’t think that she is smart enough.”
Comment 9: “What if she is going to rat on us for being out here.”
Just then, and in an instant, I went from being a distance away from them to being right in front of them.
Me: “Look, I can hear you. Quit your murmuring. You sound ridiculous. I am just excited to make a hole in one. I will be moving on now. However, you really don’t want to upset me, if you know what I mean.”
They were in complete shock. They dropped what they were holding, screamed and ran. I was laughing as I went to look for my husband and children. I was still sad though. I was sad I was late for the memorial. Even though I understood why, I was also sad that my friend did not want to carve out any time to catch up with me.
Sub-dream 1 over…
I just heard the sad news that singer John Prine had just died of the Corona Virus. My parents had one of his 8-Track Tapes. I think my mom might have even knew him personally, but I wasn’t sure. She knew quite a few of the singers of that era. We went to so many concerts when I was young that I barely remember any of the details. I hated it because everyone was always smoking, drinking and doing drugs.
So many of the songs from this era of 1968 to 1975 are sad. It was a sad time. The young people were rebelling against their parents and the government. I remember all of them sitting in groups for hours complaining about the world and their situation. They would then use drugs and alcohol to escape. They also had a warped view of themselves. They believed that they were morally superior to others.
It was the times, the age of everyone breaking free and then realizing that they couldn’t afford it. That block of time for me was the worst, just awful, full of tragedy and poverty. In reality, my parents were too irresponsible to have children. They were too busy concerning themselves only with ‘me, myself and I’. To my parents, we were baggage. It was such a sad time.
I decided to listen to some old songs of John Prine. While I thought that perhaps I would appreciate them more, it instead brought back painful memories. His song ‘Hello in there’ is a good song, but so depressing. It reminded me of my mom crying to it. She cried because the song reminded her of her parents. Witnessing this as a young child was just so horribly sad.
I then listened to some other songs that I associated with this era. They were all depressing me. There was Joan Baez’s ‘Diamonds and rust’. There was Gordon Lightfoot’s ‘If you could read my mind’. There was Jackson Brown’s ‘Fountain of Sorrow’. There was Jimmy Cliff’s ‘The harder they come’. What an emotional journey this was. It reminded me once again of the conditions I grew up in.
We had very little furniture in our house. We had a pool table. We had a dining table with four metal and Formica chairs. We had some shelves on cinder blocks with wood planks that held the stereo and speakers. Other than this, there was very little. We really had no keepsakes at all. Our clothes were gross and usually came from Thrift Stores that had little quality control.
I had a green pair of tennis shoes with no arch support that I had to make due with for over two years. It had holes upon holes. I had to play sports in these as this is all that I had. The other kids were not exactly sympathetic. Far from it. I could see them pointing and laughing, not always in whispers, as they pointed to my outfits. Instead of photos or items as souvenirs, all I had was music. Songs were our memories.
I had a couple of houseplants in my room. I used salvage things to try to fix it up. It really was so sad. While we were now living in an upgraded home of 1000 square feet, it was still small. However, it seemed huge compared to our 580 spare foot home in Reno NV. The house was basically a box 30 feet by 30 feet. There was a tiny add on porch serving as a laundry room / pantry that accounted for the extra square footage.
Why did my mom and stepdad not see that they were oppressed and depressed? This depression then led to my stepdad’s suicide in the garage of that 1000 square foot California home. I was going to make a return visit in the early 1990s, but I couldn’t. I just couldn’t go back. It was way too depressing. I still can’t believe how many memories I just dealt with simply because a singer from that era had died.
However, I decided that I would not allow the sadness to win. I decided that I had enough of moping around with these horrible memories. I have good reason for this…
- This is because something wonderful has changed
- Jesus is now in me!
- There is joy where there once was sorrow
- There is hope where there once was hopelessness
- There is light where there once was darkness
- There is life where there once was death
- God has made all things new!
Father, I am so grateful for all that You have done for me. These painful journeys make me so relieved and thankful for all You have done. All of it! It is a miracle! What You did for me and my brothers, and eventually my mom, are miracles. You took us out from the mire and led us into beautiful lands. I was able to grow and live in safety there. Thank You, Father!
Yes, last night and this morning were painful, but I cling to Your promises. I pray for joy to fall on all those who are scared, alone and with no hope. Father, darkness has come across the world. However, You, Lord, are the True Light of the world. You, Lord, are our one and only Savior. Thank You for all You have done for us!
Jesus: “Erin, come up.”
Before me and to my right were freshly planted fields. I could tell that they were healthy and would bring a record yield of harvest. In the distance was a beautiful bridge. The bridge crossed over raging rapids into God’s Garden. Heaven was right there. I ran down through the fields to the bridge.
While I then tried to cross the bridge, I was held back by an invisible force. I stood there looking across, but could not go. I really had no choice but to stay. I soon began to cry. I decided to turn back to look at the fields. To my surprise, Uriel was right there in front of me. He was there in full armor and mounted on his horse.
Uriel: “There is still much to do, Erin. These here are not ready yet. However, they soon will be. The harvest will require workers, but there are few. Are you no longer wishing to continue?”
Me: “Of course! Yes! Uriel, I am ready and willing. However, I thought I could go back and forth.”
Uriel: “Yes, but now is not that time. You must tend to these now.”
Me: “But, Uriel, I thought…” I let out a deep sigh as I was not understanding.
Uriel: “Erin, events are moving rapidly. As fast as that river flows, it will reshape the landscape. God is reshaping the landscape to prepare for His Workers. Do not jump ahead. He knows you are ready and willing…as well as a bit bored too. However, please look at His signs all around you. Wait for His call. It is coming. Everything around you will change. Be patient. This time is here and God is with you.
“Remember, the enemy wants you to look backwards over old bridges. He wants you imprisoned by your thoughts. He wants to use your memories as chains are to prisoners. He likes to remind you of your beginnings and that these were low. However, remind your enemy that he was lofty and resided in Heaven, yet then fell from his position. Do not fall for his antics. Still, God sometimes takes you back at times so that you remain thankful for where you now are in His care, understand?”
Me: “Oh Uriel, I never want to go back!”
Uriel: “You won’t…and neither will you fall. Now, list the signs around you that point to what God is doing. Do you see that it is already like nothing the world has ever seen? He has the final say over all things. Very soon, Heaven will be visible in those He has called. Do not worry though as you are His Lambs, not lambs sent to slaughter. Now, pray. Pray for what God is about to do in you, for it is good.”
Me: I was happy, yet still frowning. “Yes, Uriel, but it is taking such a long time!”
Uriel: Laughing. “Oh Erin, I have been with God for thousands of years. In comparison, you have only truly looked to Him for twenty years. Are you now being impatient?”
Me: Smiling. “Sorry, Uriel, but yes. It is just that twenty years in my earthly life is over a third of my life to date. Still, I am sorry for being impatient. I will try harder.”
Uriel: Smiling. “Do not worry, Erin, as He has you and He has a great plan, a plan you wouldn’t believe even if you were told. Now, hindsight is 2020. Looking back does nothing but add to your anxious thoughts. Give these to God. He will quiet your soul. You are not alone and you will soon have overwhelming joy. Now, I must go. Rejoice, rejoice, as the Kingdom of Heaven is near…even at the doorpost!”
He turned and was gone in an instant.
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